Auckland Community Church
Te Hahi Waka Huihui i Nga Tangata o Tamaki Makaurau
Family Circle October 2006
On the move
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Stephen Witherden still in Texas – see report
20 years since Homosexual Law reform
Our service on 9 July was part of the celebrations and marked a fitting end to a weekend of remembrance. Tim Barnett MP was the preacher, Frantisek’s photos are online
Planning day report
Cathy took full notes, some snippets; a phrase to describe our church “Refuge which is home”. There was a commitment from the group to occasional freely structured services. .
Retreat camp
A Saturday in January, keep your diaries free
Book Reviews
Coming In: Gays and lesbians reclaiming the spiritual journey by Urs Mattmann, Wild Goose,
This is written by a gay man for gay people. It obviously draws on the author’s experience running retreats, and includes reflections for meditation, prayers and exercises.
The Stephen Witherden story
Stephen is a relatively new face to ACC, his first service being Christmas of 2005. Born in South Africa, his parents divorced when he was 6. At that time his mother decided she could no longer take communion because of the divorce. Stephen couldn't believe that his father (who became a Baptist) was could celebrate his faith but his mother could not. From this, he developed a deep-seated mistrust of denominations.
Both of his parents have since remarried with more children. He was 18 when he immigrated to New Zealand with his mother and her husband and two other siblings in 1997. He studied an undergraduate and postgraduate BCom in software at the University of Auckland and is now a software developer working for Beca (a New Zealand based engineering firm).
It was early last year (2005), at the age of 25, when he first confronted the questions over his sexuality, questions he had studiously ignored for over a decade. Still living with his (atheist) ex girlfriend and trying to come to terms with Christian guilt seemed like an impossible task. He was at a point where he had to decide between being gay in Hell than straight in Heaven.
Stephen credits Alastair for literally saving his faith. They met online, both in what could be described in a "questioning" phase, Alastair suggested they attend ACC. Although having attended many churches of all denominations from Catholic to no-name Baptist groups, ACC is the first and only church he has ever called "home". The congregation there literally brought his faith back to life. Stephen attended regularly (one might say religiously) ever since, until his recent move to Texas.
Stephen moved to Texas in mid-July to write military software for the New Zealand P3 Orion planes, for 12 months. His current ambition is to save as much money as possible, and see as much of the US as possible: two seemingly antithetical goals.
Read almost as much as you ever want to know about him on http://stephen.geek.nz.
I arrived in Dallas, Fort Worth airport at around 10pm, a little bedraggled having made the trip via Denver of all places. That said I was grateful I ended up in Dallas at all, since my luggage didn't seem to have made it. That was eventually sorted out but was just one of the many things that made the trip a little bit less comfortable than it ought to be.
I like it hot. The first thing that hits you on arrival in Texas is the immediate and unrelenting heat, even at night the residual heat can hit you like a blast furnace as you walk out of the overly air-conditioned buildings out into the amber light of the setting Texas sun. Texas is just recovering from a particularly heavy drought and heat wave which, coming from a New Zealand winter is quite a shock to the system. That said, the South African in me soon started turning off the air conditioner and I am at the point where I can do without air conditioning most of the time.
Housing. For the first two weeks, my base of operations was my boss' own home, which he had graciously left for me to house-sit. Along with the house, I inherited three tanks of fish, a house cat and a turtle. In between feeding the animals I managed to get a driver's license, a fully furnished apartment (with a view) a car and was thrust into the middle of a very involved software development project.
Bar hopping. For someone as shy as myself, almost any situation is an opportunity for such excitement/fear. None so visceral as my very first time to a gay bar. I had never been to a gay bar before and, quite frankly, rarely frequent bars in general, certainly not on my own. I was committed to this though, so found myself hazily pushing my way through the doors to the Roundup in Cedar Springs. Now, Cedar Springs is the so-called "gay strip" in Dallas, located directly in the centre of town I was gratified to see openly gay couples eating out at restaurants or holding hands in the street, something I don't get to see very often.
Dancing. I chose the Roundup because it is a quintessential "Country" bar. They play country music and have a big old dance floor which features more line dancing than anything else. I watched in fascination as the couples all danced the two-step to some lilting country music some of which (to my surprise) I recognized. I even got an opportunity to dance, something I had been wistfully hoping for ever since walking up to the dance floor. After an embarrassing confusion over who should lead, he let me lead him out onto the dance floor and though I am out of practice I would like to think I held my own, even in my slightly tipsy state.
Worshipping. After much searching, I settled on "The Cathedral of Hope" as my church of choice. It is a very large church (largest gay church in the world, so they say) with a congregation of over 3,000 and follows what is apparently a Methodist format. I miss the Anglican flavoured services from ACC which have a little more reflection and a little less emotion. Still, I have been meeting more gay Christians, which is good. It's still hard to find people of my own generation to relate to. I have started attending a 20'something's Bible study which, although we have depressingly not opened our Bibles once, I am enjoying.
Driving and splashing. Getting to work or the city is a 100 km round trip. I took a drive down to Austin (300 km away) for the long weekend. Austin, I discovered, is about as gay as you can get in Texas. Austin, the live music capital of the world, is a hippy town and sports Texas' only nude "beach". The "beach" consists of a wall of rocks, rather than sand. It just so happened that an event known as the "Last Splash" was on. It was with more than a little trepidation that I made my way to that one. It turns out most people kept their clothes firmly on. It was a welcome respite from the heat and quite nice to spend time with gay people my own age, especially living in a place like Texas.
Dry but not gun shy. Texas I have found to be a little enigmatic. Teenagers can own semi-automatic rifles and you can buy guns at Walmart. Where I live (Rockwall) is a "dry" county where you technically can't purchase alcohol. Rural Greenville (where I work) is full of churches and there may be KKK connections. Metropolitan Dallas, on the other hand, is a hive of cultural and commercial interest. They say you can get anything you want in Dallas, and I don't doubt them.
Texans are friendly. On the whole, I have found Texans to be a warm, welcoming people, with a generous, hearts and a friendly spirit. Eating out with the guys often involves them saying grace beforehand, something I am not used to from a cultural perspective. My "Don't like gay marriage? Then don't get one!" bumper sticker more often than not provokes a laugh. I have received a few angry looks but these are by far in the minority.
I think I am going to enjoy my next 10 months in Texas. When I return to New Zealand, I am going to have to remember to travel as much there as I do here.
Contacts:
by email: info@aucklandcommunitychurch.org.nz
by phone: Cathy and Liz (64)(09)578 1292 or Hugh Dyson (64)(09)579 1850
by snail mail: c/- 187 Federal Street, Auckland, New Zealand.
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